Follow Me As I Follow…Tommy Boy?

I love moments when the Holy Spirit uses pop culture to help me glean spiritual truth from a passage of scripture. There are days when I grapple with God’s viewpoint and can’t seem to arrive at a conclusion. Then, out of nowhere, some random scene from an iconic film rushes into my consciousness and helps me take steps forward in my journey of discipleship.

I especially love when it’s a movie that defines a generation. You know, the kind of story that causes you to take pause and contemplate your life and it’s meaning. It’s the sort of film where the writing, acting and cinematography fuse together and help your emotions soar to new heights.

On one particular afternoon I stopped at such an intersection. The passage of scripture was in the book of Acts. And the movie? Tommy Boy, of course.

Let’s start with the passage of scripture. In Acts chapter 9 the Christian movement was about to add a general into its ranks, a man that would end up writing most of our Bible’s New Testament. This man would literally carry the global Church on his back and utter phrases like, “I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me–the task of testifying to the gospel of God’s grace.” (Acts 20:24)

But that was chapter twenty. In Acts 9, we find this same Saul (later the Apostle Paul) lying on his back in the middle of Persian highway. Jesus had knocked him off of his high horse, literally. Saul was on his way to Damascus to persecute the fledgling church and terrorize anyone that stood in his way.

As Saul’s anger boiled, Jesus intervened in a flash of lightning and revealed Himself to Saul. Saul had a change of heart (no kidding) and made a choice to put his faith in Jesus. The very movement he violently fought against was now the truth he was anchored to. Blinded by the encounter, Saul was led to a house in which he stayed for three days without eating. You can call it fasting; I’ll call it anxiety.

Meanwhile across town another Christian disciple, Ananias, was also engaged in prayer. As he was interceding, God came in a vision and delivered the report about Saul’s conversion. Then He adds this uncomfortable set of instructions, “Go find Saul and pray for him to receive his sight.” To which Ananias contends (and I paraphrase), “But Lord, I’ve heard all about the heinous acts this man has committed and how he’s authorized to arrest anyone who calls on Your name.” In other words, “Are you kidding me God? Do you know what this guy has done – what he could do to me?”

God tells him again to go find Saul. He tells him that Saul is His choice to bring the gospel across the known world. So Ananias goes out to find the location of the sightless persecutor. The Bible says in Acts 19:7 that when he found Saul, he laid his hands on him and said, “Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus has sent me to find you…” and in an instant Saul was healed of his blindness and filled with God’s Spirit.

Brother Saul. Brother….Saul. Perhaps the magnitude of Ananias’ greeting is unappreciated. Brother (and sister) was an expression used by Christians to convey a family bond and promote intimate access. And later Paul himself would use this term to continue the tone of community and equality in the body of Christ. Brother Saul. Ananias demonstrates an incredible example of God’s grace. As a result of one conversation with God, he is able to overlook Saul’s history of savagery and extend an invitation of family. Ananias chooses restoration over retribution, acceptance over alienation.

How often do we struggle to look past the past of others? How often do we battle internally to fully embrace someone who made a choice to follow Christ?

I’ve heard it said that the ground is level at the foot of the cross. This truth applies to you, to me and to everyone who calls on the name of the Lord for salvation. Instead of seeing ourselves as spiritually superior and judging others through a distorted filter of moral perfection, we need to accept people the way God accepted us: without condition.

Brother Saul, I thought…and then, suddenly, the following scene from Tommy Boy raced into my mind as the most complete of illustrations:

I wonder what our churches would look like if we freely embraced one another like this? According to Jesus Himself in John 13:35, our love for one another will prove to the world that we are His disciples.

We need to shift our focus from tearing each other down to tearing down every wall that dares to separate us as believers. We need to fight for family. Sometimes it’s a show of kindness. Other times we need to repent for our prejudice. You may even find yourself hugging it out.

After all, brothers (and sisters) gotta hug…

Love Brings Freedom

Come see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?, is probably one of the shortest and most awkward sermons I have ever heard. I doubt this four-second declaration (yes, I timed it) would garner thousands of podcast downloads today or shatter any YouTube viewing records. And yet, according to the gospel of John, a Samaritan woman in chapter four won an entire town to Jesus with this exact evangelistic call to action.

In ancient villages such as Sychar in Samaria, nobody’s business was private and nothing was hidden. Everyone knew your personal history. Success could follow you forever, as could failure. Factor in both the heavy-handed tenets of Mosaic Law and Jewish customs and it all blended into a burdensome moral cocktail. In those days, one failed marriage could leave a permanent stain on your ethical score card and shadow you for life. However, as Jesus revealed in a moment of compassion, this particular woman had carried the shame of five failed marriages and was now living with a man that she wasn’t married to. She was no saint…at least not yet.

In a single exchange at a local water well, Jesus, keenly aware of this woman’s story, chose to reveal His divinity to her. Not many people in the gospels got the personal “Hey, I’m that Messiah you’ve been waiting for” chat and yet this woman with the checkered past was one of them. Think about the barriers that Jesus dismissed just to engage with her.

There was the prevailing point that Jewish people didn’t associate with Samaritans at all, dogs they called them at the time. Add in the taboos about a man talking alone with a woman, then humbling Himself by asking her to draw water for Him and finally drinking it out of her “ceremonially unclean” water pail and we see Jesus smashing through just about every social barricade that existed. Essentially, Jesus embraced her as the beautiful daughter He had created her to be and looked right past her glaring flaws.

“Come see a man who told me everything I ever did!” she cried out joyfully. Again, her announcement was not a shocking revelation to her peers. Everyone knew who she was and what she had done. What the town had never seen before was this same woman wholly free from the shame of an infamous past. The result of Christ’s unapologetic love was her liberation from a lifelong prison of guilt, humiliation and public ridicule.

Her freedom was so inspiring that it peaked the curiosity of an entire village. The scriptures say the people of Sychar begged Jesus to stay with them for a few more days and many believed in Him. A town was spiritually awakened by the most unlikely of evangelists. A woman was emancipated from captivity of every kind because of the Savior’s love.

1 John 4:18 states: There is no fear in love; instead, perfect love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment. So the one who fears has not reached perfection in love. (Emphasis added)

What our world needs first is not our values or our brand of morality, it needs our acceptance. Our ability as Christ followers to push past stereotypes, stigmas and our own reputation is the point at which we truly display the love of Christ. Love brings freedom. Who will you love without condition today?

Thundersnow: What Jim Cantore Taught Me About Leadership

As I write this post, I am only hours removed from some of the coldest weather of my life. I’m talking about temperatures dipping into the negative teens when factoring in wind chill. It’s the kind of bitter cold that makes you wonder how people can even catch their breath outdoors. We are, after all, comprised of 60% water as human beings are we not? I’m reminded of that every time I see long slabs of ice hugging the sidewalks in Brooklyn. It creates an enormous sense of urgency to get myself to the local subway station as fast as I can.

The Northeast in general has been under severe winter warnings over the last few weeks and as much as I would like to complain there are many cities that have gotten hit much harder than New York City. Even still, this icy vortex has dominated about ninety percent of our average conversations and even created friends out of strangers while waiting in the checkout line of the corner bodega. And while most of the dialogue is understandably negative, there are pockets of people around the northeast excited about the continuing arctic freeze. Apparently every last one of them works for the Weather Channel. And among that group, there are none more joyous than meteorologist Jim Cantore.

If you aren’t familiar with Jim Cantore, his vigorous and lively personality makes you want to check Al Roker for a pulse. Jim is famously known for his live weather reports in severe storm conditions and has more recently made the viral video rounds thanks to a rare blizzard marvel called “Thundersnow”. Thundersnow is basically a thunder and lightning show in the middle of a snow shower. Excited yet? Me neither. But that didn’t stop Jim’s exuberant outburst of passion when that storm hit several days ago. If you haven’t watched the clip of his broadcast in Boston, it’s definitely worth two minutes of your life. (I would recommend that you watch #Thundersnow [see below] before finishing this post.)

My bout of laughter finally subsided as the video clip ended, and I began to think about what has made this guy an international sensation. Anyone who passionately exclaims, “You can have your $500 million jackpot in Power Ball, but I’ll take [this Thundersnow] anytime baby!” is someone that I NEED to meet. I have never really been excited about the weather, at least beyond how it impacts the way I dress each morning. But after seeing Jim’s jubilant fury I am motivated to expand my understanding of atmospheric phenomena. So what drives me to know more about severe winter storms from Jim Cantore? It isn’t because he is knowledgeable about the subject, otherwise I’d be glued to my TV every night at 11pm to hear my local meteorologist. No, it was not simply knowledge; it was Jim’s endless amounts of enthusiasm and unashamed expression of that joy that caused me to lean in.

And then the leadership lesson hit me like that same snowstorm: A leader’s joy-filled passion gives them influence and creates a platform for them to share their expertise.

As leaders, we cannot think that just because we are well studied or experienced in our craft we should be automatically given a position of influence or entitled to an audience. What draws people into our lives, our expertise and ultimately our cause is undeniable passion. I read a quote recently that said, “The people with the most hope have the most influence.”

Hope is an unrelenting belief in a positive future. Who doesn’t want to be around a leader or a vision like that? Too often we try to teach people what we know and expect they will respect or follow us based on our capacity or organizational position. But people are not attracted to knowledge alone. Should leaders be competent? Yes. Should leaders be skilled? Of course. But before you open your mouth, ask yourself if people can discern that you are personally overrun with hope and joy-filled passion for your calling. If the answer is yes, then it won’t be long until people will stop to hear what you have to say.

Kindness Isn’t Random

I’m starting to uncover the truth about kindness, and I’m realizing that there is nothing random about it. Like the next person, I enjoy being spontaneously blessed by others when I least expect it. I love being surprised at the office when my wife comes by on her day off. I love it when someone makes a coffee run and asks if I need (yes, need) any thing to drink. I feel cared for when I receive a text from a friend saying they’re praying for me and I am grateful when I receive a word of encouragement that speaks to my potential in moment of disappointment.

These moments of spontaneous generosity are activities we define as “random acts of kindness”. But kindness, at least biblical kindness, appears to be more than just an ethical accessory we insert into our daily routine. Being nice and being kind are not the same. According to Galatians 5:22 kindness is a part of the Holy Spirit’s fruit, a byproduct of a healthy relationship with the Holy Spirit Himself. I shouldn’t have to will myself to do nice things for people or try really hard to speak words of encouragement to people. If I’m intentional about building my friendship with the Holy Spirit, then kindness should come naturally as a result.

But even deeper still, the Holy Spirit’s brand of kindness is more than a random act of human decency. The original Greek word used in scripture is defined as moral goodness or integrity. In other words, kindness isn’t just about doing nice things for/to people; God’s kindness actually pricks our heart and deals with the way we fundamentally value humanity. Moral goodness means that no matter what condition or status someone is in, a kind person will offer the same level of consideration and compassion. I have been guilty in the past of being “kind” to people who I know can repay me or help me gain traction in my ambitions. But genuine, Godly kindness dispenses compassion toward everyone regardless of who they are or what they can or can’t do for me. In other words, we see everyone the way God does.

Cynicism, heavy sarcasm and criticism of others are kindness killers in us because they attack the core of people’s worth. Often times we chalk it up to humor or jest, when we actually train ourselves that degrading someone’s God-given value is acceptable. The Kingdom alternative(s) to cynicism, sarcasm and criticism is hope that believes the best, verbal affirmation and compassionate correction. When the Holy Spirit produces His kindness in us, we will naturally offer encouragement, be generous and build people up through our actions and words. Why? Because we will see everyone the way God does, valuable and full of potential. We will embody the love described in Ephesians 5:2: Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of Himself to us. Love like that.

What could our personal world, and the one at large, look like if we loved like that?

Is Delegation Selfish? | Part One

I remember the day I stepped fully into leadership for the first time. It wasn’t as if I hadn’t had opportunities to lead or influence decisions before, but that day was different. That day someone had entrusted me with a fledgling initiative, a small group of people to lead and to care for on my own. I was handed the opportunity to birth a youth ministry at a church in Los Angeles. I found out quickly that service programming, events and organizational structure were not a great foundation to build on. Those things only survive on the back of strong culture and values and so I set out to engineer and pioneer culture and values.

Little by little we began to attract more people, both students and leaders. As the youth ministry grew I discovered that I would be unable to perform every function needed to pull off a weekly services, pastoral care and the administration that supported it. I found myself preparing every week’s sermon, setting up and tearing down the event, praying with students, going to athletic events, meeting with parents, leading worship, doing expense reports, managing a website, launching a video channel on YouTube…you get the idea. It was too much and I was not only losing my personal steam, I was stunting the growth of the ministry that my soul was carrying. Suddenly I had an epiphany, I should have other people do this with me.

Now, the idea of “never going alone” in leadership is one of the most basic ones and in one way or the other every leader figures out that no matter how gifted we think we are, we are unable to do everything. I needed people to partner with me in building and over time I was faced with two options when it came to the way I would lead people. It was either lease or release; that is, delegate or empower. On the surface the two ideas (delegation and empowerment) don’t seem to conflict. In fact many would say they are the same concept: people come along side of you and go accomplish your vision. And while the busyness of others looks like teamwork from the outside, only one of the two methods of leading others really produces a long-term success for the team and for the individual. In my experience the better answer is not delegation.

I’d like to offer 5 ways I believe empowerment is more effective than delegation. We’ll take a look at two of them in Part One of this post.

1.) Empowerment asks why; delegation says how.

One of the teams in our Brooklyn church community is responsible every Sunday for setting up The Lounge. Essentially it’s our version of a church foyer where people can connect with friends over coffee and light snacks, find information about upcoming events at the church and meet new people. Prior to our lounge opening 30 minutes before the service, some set up needs to happen. Before set up can happen, some thought went into the design of the lounge. But even before the how can happen, there is a why. As a leader I have an important choice to make. Either I can tell a team how and where to set everything up, or I can teach why we have a lounge in the first place. Delegation gives people a list of executable tasks and usually a precise way of doing them. Empowerment believes that understanding the reason behind the task is more important. If I can effectively impart the values and vision behind why we need a comfortable place where people can develop genuine friendships then I can release a team to brainstorm and execute the best way to make that vision happen. Their ideas may be better than mine. But having the best ideas isn’t what defines leadership. It’s the leader’s job to release the best idea – in many cases, the one that doesn’t come from you. Case in point, that’s exactly what happened in our lounge in Brooklyn recently.

One of the unique challenges we get to solve every week is the venue in which we meet. We gather in a movie theater and our lounge is at the bottom of an escalator, on the bottom floor. It’s an incredible effort but the whole space is transformed into God’s House every week (I’m pretty convinced that the Holy Spirit plays the largest role in that). But for a season, we were having a difficult time creating a hospitable first impression beyond the greeters at the front door. Some of the space our lounge occupied was unused and had some tables and displays positioned around it. We found that it was hard connecting visitors and guests at the moment of stepping off the escalator. Instead of me trying to come up with the best solution, I simply asked the team to find the best way to utilize the space in the most welcoming way possible at the bottom of the escalator and then I said, “Surprise me”. The team delivered and produced a collective result better than anything I could have dreamed up (you can come visit and see – we’d love to have you) and everyone won; our church family, our guests, our teams and our leaders who realized that the why can be accomplished by a number of different hows. This may a simple example of empowerment, but when you implement this kind of culture and reinforce it over time it begins to produce leaders who can dream and strategize on their own, all while reinforcing the values that drive you.

2.) Empowerment trusts; delegation tasks.

When leaders step into a position where they have the final say, it’s very tempting to run point on every detail and project. This is partly because of a newfound freedom but mostly because we have a certain level of success or a specific eye for seeing things, which is why we were entrusted in the first place. We naturally lean toward the thought that initiatives should have our direct influence in every way. I would suggest you run from that impulse as quickly as you can otherwise you will find yourself delegating. As I stated earlier, a delegating leader will have specific instructions for completing something a precise way leaving no room for a person to include their unique fingerprint in the execution. And because there is no room for diversified leadership and individual problem solving among teams, delegating leaders tend to be the “go to” person for every single decision. Empowering leaders on the other hand bring their people into the brainstorm process and in the development of strategy allow their teams to run point. This style of leadership takes an enormous amount of time and energy – but trust always does. There is a process of building rapport, training judgment (or “critical eye”) and asking a lot of questions to help you understand the way your team leads think. The empowering leader will spend a lot of time outside of the actual event and work toward relationships with key team members and then we can trust them to execute the vision and values in any way they deem necessary. This kind of releasing inspires people, grows their personal capacity and truly shows a level of trust in their abilities and unique skill sets. If you want something done your way – and fast, then delegate. You may achieve short-term satisfaction, but you’ll find yourself having to own everything all the time. However if you want someone who can advance your vision and values over and over on their own, then take the time to empower. Giving away control could result in immediate outcomes less than you desired, but in the long run you build leaders that think for themselves, and then soon enough they will begin to think like you.

I currently pastor/lead a church community in New York City and often I tell our teams that I strongly dislike the word delegation. Delegation carries the illusion of building people, but in the end their value or potential isn’t ever addressed. Delegation may accomplish tasks, but I’m not in the business of simply finishing tasks; I’m here to build people, to build Kingdom. Empowerment is a selfless style because it releases people to personally grow in their potential not just learn one way of doing things. Of course “stuff” needs to get done but I am more concerned about challenging someone’s capacity while we complete projects together. This is the essence of good leadership and empowerment should be the approach we choose. While there are many strategies and personalities in leadership that will affect the way in which a leader leads it’s the way we see people that ultimately allows us to create an environment where they truly flourish and reproduce themselves.

Next week I’ll address three other ways that I think empowerment is a better approach than delegation. Until then, what are some other differences you see between delegation and empowerment? Is it just semantics? Feel free to comment; I’d love to hear your thoughts.